Tips for Supporting Transitional-Age Foster Youth in College

Tips for Supporting Transitional-Age Foster Youth in College

Studies show that the average adult is not fully self-sufficient until their mid-twenties.  Transitional-age foster youth are no different. These young adults also need guidance and support making the successful transition into college and adulthood. As a foster parent or adult supporter, you can have an important role and make a difference in the life of transitional-age foster youth. Here are 10 basic tips to help you succeed with supporting and mentoring your foster youth student in college.

1.      Trust. Your foster youth student must be able to trust you. Many times these youth have been abused, abandoned, or neglected making trust an important component of a relationship. Follow through on promises and things you say you are going to do.

2.      Guidance. You are there to offer guidance, not discipline. Young adults are learning to manage their freedom and responsibilities. They may not always do things perfectly or the way you would like but you have to provide him or her space to make their own decisions.

3.      Don’t judge. As previously mentioned, young adults are learning to manage their freedom and responsibilities. When a young adult has made a mistake or needs help they need to safe and non-judgmental person to talk with. If you are judgmental or too hard on the young adult he or she will not feel comfortable speaking with about personal issues or concerns. Your positive guidance can offer new perspectives and words of encouragement when the youth needs it the most.

4.      Believe. First, you must believe that your foster youth student can be successful in college. Then you must communicate that belief to him or her. Positive reinforcement and belief in someone can shape their own ideas of what is possible for their future.

5.      Become informed. Become informed about the resources available to help your foster youth student go to college. You do not have to be a college graduate or even have ever attended college to help your foster youth student. All you have to do is search the internet for resources or speak with a knowledgeable high school or college counselor or speak with a social worker. At least one of these individuals should be able to assist you or point you in the right direction.

6.      Access Resources. Colleges and universities have a multitude of resources to assist students throughout their academic career. Encourage your foster youth student to seek advice from an academic advisor about the resources available to him or her and then encourage him or her to actually use those resources.

7.      Promote Independence. Young adults need assistance with learning basic life skills to help them become independent, self-sufficient adults. Some examples are managing money, time management, renting an apartment, paying bills, purchasing a car, and etc. Take the time to show your foster youth student how to do these basic life skills. Although there are programs that do this, a young adult would benefit from the one-on-one attention and repetition of such valuable information.

8.      Self Advocacy. Part of independence is the ability to self advocate. Foster youth may need support learning how to self advocate or ask for help. Encourage your youth to self advocate and to ask for help when needed. Many young adults may believe that being independent means “You don’t need help.” Bust this myth for the youth and let the youth know that we all need help at different times in life.

9.      Accountability. Part of becoming an independent, self-sufficient adult is taking responsibility for your actions. Don’t try to “fix” the youth’s mistake or protect them from consequences. Just like any other young adult—transitional age foster youth will have to reap the benefits and consequences of their decisions. These experiences will help them grow if the youth takes the opportunity to learn from the decision. Foster parents and adult supporters can help the youth by becoming a “listening ear” and help the youth reflect on what has been learned. 

10.  Checking In. Life is very busy for a college student. Don’t take it personally if the youth does not reach out to frequently. Take the initiative and check in with the student. Ask about how the student is doing or ask about their classes or ask about how he or she is managing specific aspects of their life. The youth will appreciate that you are reaching out to them and this small act will communicate that you care and are concerned about their well-being. A little attention can go a long way.

Confessions of Light Privilege

I am currently reading a book about White Privilege and this entry is just a few of my thoughts as I process the concepts in the book. (Part 3, chapter 4)

Perhaps, it is a bit late to disclose this but I wanted to address my expectations about reading this book. I expected to be bored. In my arrogance, I thought, “What could this book teach me about White privilege that I don’t know through experience, other than some historical facts.”

However, I expected my White colleagues in the class to lower their defenses, role-up their sleeves and do the tough emotional work and allow the book to transform their views about privilege. After reading part 1, I thought why don’t I expect the same from myself? I began to think deeper about the concepts introduced in this book and tried to think of ways I could adapt them to areas of privilege in my own life. I, too, should role up my sleeves and do the tough emotional work to transform my own ideas about the areas of privilege I possess.

I believe that we are all privileged and oppressed in some way or another. Over the years, it has been very easy for me to recognize personal areas of oppression. In fact, I have allowed so much of the oppression to shape my identity and reality. I have not considered taking the time to explore the other parts of that reality--which are my areas of privilege. I do not deny the discrimination and oppression I experienced, however, I have not given thought to the ways in which I am member of oppressive groups.

I claim to believe in justice. If I really believe this, I MUST confront my own prejudices and areas of privilege. I must do the hard work. The work means: critical self examination, acknowledging my areas of privilege, identifying my contributions as part of system in an oppressive group, and have the courage to work toward justice.

With all of this, it provides a point of reference for how I analyzed the rest of these chapters. In chapter four, I made a connection between white privilege and what I call “light privilege.” Being a lighter-skinned minority has afforded me an edge over my darker-skinned minority counter parts. I too have discounted the discrimination of darker-skinned folks. Unfortunately, I have said things like, “they [who ever the darker skinned person was at the time] just need to know how to navigate the white man’s system” or “they need to know how to play the game.” There are times that I recall when I gave little validation to the fact that their darker skin made life harder for them. I thought we’re all Blacks but some of us don’t know how to “play the game.”

Thinking back on many situations in my life, I was the “first” friend, girlfriend, employee, etc in the lives of many Whites that I knew. My assumption now is that my mixed ethnic heritage and lighter skin made me more palatable to many whites. Being palatable allowed those whites who were “on the fence” to give me chance or access. I carry much of that dismal attitude within my own interracial discrimination. All I can do now is to be conscious of this and work to do better and believe others when they tell me that their darker skin makes a difference. This is my confession of “light privilege.”

“Am I willing to give up who I am for who I want to become?”

Currently, I am reading a book titled White Privilege. This particular entry is about part 3, chapter 2 "Privilege as a paradox." The chapter made a lot of sense because the author's framework for understanding the concept of privilege aligns closely with my epistemological philosophy centered around social constructivism. I believe that knowledge and truth are subjective and constructed within the context of society and human understanding. I agree with the author of this chapter and his definition of privilege which is in relation to a group or social categories. Johnson, the author, also writes, “When it comes to privilege, then it doesn’t matter who we really are. What matters is who other people think we are, which is to say, the social categories they put us in.” I agree that understanding who is privileged and is not privileged cannot be solely understood without societal context and human perspective.

I also found the yin and the yang concept of privilege very interesting. Johnson writes, for every privileged group there are one or more oppressed groups. Although this concept may seem quite obvious to most, I have never really stopped to think about this. In order for some to have access to privilege, others therefore must be lacking of opportunities and privilege. Personally, this concept hit home for me. It actually made me feel really bad. In the areas which I am privileged and have gains means another group is lacking? Is the other group lacking because of my gains? If I try to equalize the distribution of privilege and power does that mean I have to lose something in order for the other group to gain?

To illustrate my point (or dilemma) I will included an adapted entry from my journal regarding my recent trip to Cambodia.

As an American, I did not realize how privileged I was when it came to consuming resources. I read somewhere that Americans resource “footprint” in the world is 10 times greater than that of many under developed countries such as India.

In Cambodia, I saw that many people did not have easy access to clean or even safe drinking water. This really hit home with me. I complain about the taste of the water from my sink and insist on drinking purified water. I really don’t know why because the water from my sink is perfectly fine. Drinking purified water has become a way of life for me and something I somewhat consider a right. Now, I feel like it is very elitist of me to feel this way.

I feel really upset that so many in the world suffer from disease and even death simply from lack of access to clean water. Yet as an American, I have the luxury and audacity to literally shit in five gallons of clean water that many in the world do not even have access to. [Sorry for the strong language but I intentionally used that word because it best describes how disrespectful I think this is in the context of so much human suffering.]

My point in sharing this example is to illustrate how my benefits from systems of privilege were invisible in my own life. As I come to realize my areas of privilege and my gains from the system, what then do I have to “give up” so another group can gain? Do I have to lose something for another to gain? If the answer is “yes” would I actually do it? I hope I would because it sounds like the righteous and noble thing to do. But would I really give up my convenience, my access, my privilege and my comforts? This is a difficult question for me because I guess so much that I take for granted has shaped my identity and reality. I have to ask myself, “Am I willing to give up who I am for who I want to become?”

White Privilege: Part 1:Chp 2: Failing to see

In the book, White Privilege (2005) Dalton, the author of chapter two, asserts that most White people fail to see or understand themselves in racial terms. Dalton makes a clear distinction between ethnicity and race. Ethnicity is one’s culture which describes aspects of their heritage, while race exist only in relation to another. For example, Blackness does not exist without Whiteness and the opposite would be true (p.16). With those differences, most people draw significant strength, pride, and understanding from knowing their cultural heritage (i.e. - Chinese-American, Irish-American, Native American, and etc).


The author purposefully makes the distinction between ethnicity and race because he believes that the quality of one’s life (at least in terms of the United States) is greatly impacted by these two categories. White is not an ethnicity, it is a physical characteristic given as an inherit birth-right, which comes with a set of advantages (p.18). A person of color in the United States is often times acutely aware that their race and/or their ethnicity will put them at a disadvantage. The author would claim that most White people are oblivious to the racial consequences for people of color because their Whiteness is the norm and White is the dominant group.

Within the larger historical contexts of the United States, I agree with the ideas that the author writes about. After speaking with a friend/colleague of mine, (who I believe identifies as German-American) I have begun to see this same topic from a slightly different perspective. She has shared some of her experiences as a blonde-hair, blue-eyed White girl in the predominately Mexican community of Dinuba, California. In Dinuba, she was the minority and considered the “other.” She would argue that the concept of White Privilege is situational. I have never considered this as being a reality for anyone who is White. In this context, she was the minority. Based on her personal experiences, she was at a societal disadvantage in the most immediate sense for that particular location and within the surrounding communities. Her story and those like it are important and should be considered when addressing White Privilege theory. I am paraphrasing but she would say that White Privilege theory needs to modified and updated for the future when Whites will be the minority (in terms of numbers).

I agree with her that she was the minority and at a disadvantage in Dinuba, however, I would contend that she was not the minority in sense of power as part of a larger people group within the context of the United States. As an adult, she could relocate to most parts of the United States and rejoin the ranks of the privileged. It is a far more uncommon experience that those deemed White in our society must survive the adversity of living in a community where they endure the perpetual disadvantage of being the minority. I would argue that her experience is unfortunate but rare for the majority of Whites in this country.

During our conversation, we both agreed that we would replace the terms minority/majority with dominant/non-dominant to accurately reflect the concept of White Privilege and so it can be utilized on a broader scale. When a particular group is the dominant group, they intentionally or unintentionally, do not see their privilege and possess the potential to marginalize the other. Whether intentional or not, the negative impact is felt none-the-less. For example, as a supervisor of an emerging program called Renaissance Scholars, I did not immediately notice how aspects of my identity could marginalize others. I am Black and Asian American but physically appear to be more African-American. The other staff person in the program happens to be African-American as well. When I was developing a student brochure for Renaissance Scholars, originally I put pictures of the staff and pictures of graduated students. Me, my staff, and the pictures I had of graduates were all African-American. When I circulated the brochure for edits, I received questions like, “Is Renaissance Scholars just for African-Americans? Do you have to be Black to be in this program?”

The Renaissance Scholars Program is not intended for Blacks but for high-achieving former foster youth and independent youth at the university. I did not realize how “my normal” was marginalizing others. Needless to say, I removed all photos of just African-Americans and intentionally found pictures of diverse student groups. I believe we all have prejudice and/or bias. We must be intentional about recognizing those bias and work toward being sensitive and inclusive, while respecting the differences.

Chapter 1: The matter of Whiteness

“As long as race is something only applied to non-white peoples, as long as white people are not racially seen and named, they/we functions as a human norm. Other people are raced, we are just people” (Rothenberg, 2005, p.10).


This chapter, The Matter of Whiteness, focuses on the racial imagery of White people. The ideas, values, and norms of the Western cultural are centered on Whiteness. To be White is to be normal. To be normal, which is the standard that all other ethnic groups are measured against, is the equivalent of “being human.” Dyer, the chapter’s author, gives examples of how the racial imagery of Whiteness are perpetuated in everyday life. This White imagery is especially highlighted in daily use through speech and visual images. When White people speak of the “other” White people name the ethnicity of the other. For example, Whites often refer to the Blackness or Mexicaness of friends, colleagues, customers, or clients but do not refer to the Whiteness of White people they know (Rothenberg, 2005).

Dyer also writes about the invisibility of Whiteness and its power. White people have access to this power and privilege and intentionally or unintentionally participate in it. “White power, nonetheless reproduces itself regardless of intention, power differences and goodwill, and overwhelmingly because it is not seen as whiteness, but as normal (Rothenberg, 2005, p. 12).

An everyday, routine activity such as thumbing through a magazine stands out in my mind when reflecting on this topic. My senior year in high-school, (which was a predominately White school) I brought a magazine to school so I could thumb through it before class started. This was a common practice for many high-school girls. I was so excited to have the newest edition of Essence magazine (which was geared toward African-American females). A White girl behind me asked if she could look at my magazine. I didn’t mind because she often shared her magazines with me. She asked me, “Why are there only Black people in this magazine.” I was so offended but I didn’t have the vocabulary to articulate my frustration at the time. Instead I snapped at her and replied sharply, “I don’t know. Why are their only White people in the magazines you read?” Then I snatched the magazine away from her and faced forward in my seat.

Looking back on this situation, I know now that I got tired of consistently getting bombarded with images of Whiteness because it did not give voice or value to my existence, experiences or my norms. In that moment, with that White girl, I was mad that my Blackness was named and her Whiteness was accepted as the normal. What was worse is that she could not see it and I felt frustrated because I did not know how to speak about it. This incident is one of many in my life that re-affirmed that power of the invisibility of Whiteness which equates to privilege and can easily marginalize the other.

What's New?!

What’s New?!

I hope this new post finds all of my friends in good health and in good spirits. It has been a while since I last posted on my blogspot.

I am excited to share and dialogue with others about my current reading on the second edition of White Privilege: Essential readings on the other side of racism by Paula Rothenberg. White Privilege is a collection of writings from multiple authors on the topic of White privilege and explores how certain groups benefit from this racial bias.

This book, along with others, is required text for my Diversity class. The expectation for this reading is that students summarize and reflect on each chapter of the book. I have included the book’s ISBN number and citation at the bottom in case others are interested in reading along. I encourage your thoughts, questions, and feedback. Stay tuned, there is more to come….

Rothenberg, P.S. (2005). White Privilege: Essential readings on the other side of racism (2nd edition). New York, NY: Worth Publishers. ISBN: 0-7167-8733-4

Too few women of color with doctorate degrees....

Based on data from the National Science Foundation here are some statistics on women of color doctorates: In 1973, 33,755 doctorates were awarded nationwide to women and men of all races and ethnicities. Of that number, Black women doctorates were. 0.5%, Hispanic women doctorates were 0.13%, Asian or Pacific Islander women were 0.6% and American Indian or Alaskan women were 0.006%.Twenty-five years later in 1998, 42,683 people received doctorates. Black women doctorates were 2.5%, Hispanic women doctorates were 1.9%, Asian or Pacific Islander women doctorates were 5.9% and American Indian or Alaskan women doctorates were 0.2%.
found on the aawu website